It has been a while since I wrote anything with a specifically Feminist message, and the men’s rights activists have finally stopped picketing my house from my first feminist post, so clearly it’s time to write another. Because who doesn’t enjoy lectures about equality accompanied by a trilby, neckbeard, and over-aggressive, misguided chivalry?
However between Men’s right’s activism like #notallmen, and the actual issues like the Elliot Rodgers shootings (that quickly and helpfully prove #notallmen to be an incredible waste of breath), there’s a lot going on in the Feminist world. And frankly it’s all pretty rough.
You know what? This was going to be one of my usual silly posts, highlighting the unfairness of how men’s and women’s pants are sized, but as strongly as I want to make jokes about how hilariously cruel it is for women to have to play pants-roulette to find something that fits, I don’t think I have it in me today. Which stinks, because I really wanted to.
After re-reading the Rodgers shooting, I’m not sure I can continue to make jokes about fake feminist issues, because there’s so many real ones out there. Violence against women is very real. Rape culture is very real. Even the neckbeards who call themselves “nice guys” are a real problem, because when they complain about being rejected and how unfair it is, they show they feel entitled to the girl in question.
Let me reiterate that: They feel entitled to the emotions and decisions of another human being.
We are institutionally teaching our men to feel superior, to feel as if women owe them. We are teaching them their value is based upon their success with women, and that women are a commodity. We are teaching them that women are to be conquered. With our “boys will be boys” attitude, we are teaching young men that they are all inherently rapists. And that we believe it is okay.
Furthermore, in all of this, we have somehow convinced our young women that it is their fault. We are teaching our women they are to blame, that they should be afraid. We are teaching them they have to hide their faces and their bodies, and stay quiet and out of sight. We show them unattainable standards of beauty, and then condemn them for wearing makeup and showing off.
We encourage our boys to be excellent, to be leaders. We tell our girls they’re too bossy, and need to be modest.
We cannot take this lightly. We cannot brush it under the rug, ignore the fact that we are a culture in which men are told they can make decisions for women. I am not asking you to march on Washington. I am asking you to open your eyes and acknowledge what you see.
I am asking you this because there’s only one crime in today’s world where we ask what the victim was wearing.